Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Prying My Grubby Little Fingers

Eight years ago, I became a wife at the young age of nineteen. I was still pretty wound up and focused on myself. I have always been pretty forward-thinking, a dreamer, head-in-the-clouds, bossy, annoying, well I guess that should do. Anyhow, I had my life planned out. And, being a low income wife and homeschooling mother of four children really wasn't in the plans. After all, I was going to college, that guaranteed riches and success - right? Over the years, the Lord has gently pried my hands off of the junk that I call precious. He has been faithful to bless me despite my foolishness, yet I remain a fool.

He has recently had to pry again.

My dear husband had fatherhood thrust upon him quite young, and before he really had time to consider a career. And, as you know, once fatherhood began, it continued quite rapidly. Fast-forward eight years later, he is a father to four dear ones and is still faithfully remaining with the same job he began nearly eight years ago. I, being the bossy, dreamy, annoying one have recently seen fit to find him a career that suits him better. "Maybe you'd like this, or that dear. Shall I research it for you? Shall I schedule an interview or an appointment for you?" And on, and on I go. Where does it all end? Frustration. Frustration, because it's my idea and not his.

And so, with His gentle prying, I am doing my best to release my grip on what I think is best. Especially with the upcoming Holiday, it is fitting that I focus on what I can be thankful for. I have a husband who loves the Lord, me and our children. He is faithful to provide for us. And, he's pretty cute and can always make me laugh. As I let go of selfish ambitions, and thank the Lord for his goodness; I can again focus on my job, and let my husband focus on his... praying all the way through.

4 comments:

  1. Kendra, Thanks for your honesty. This too shall pass, you and West are a great team and will figure this out. Finances will not always be an issue! Just remember that. It always helps me to remember the people in other countries who really are poor instead of the "wealthy" culture that we are surrounded in as Americans. And you and West have four little investments so much greater than any amount of money could ever buy! I know you know that. (And thanks for your comment on my post also!)

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  2. forward-thinking?...yes, me too.
    dreamer?..yes.
    head-in-the-clouds?bossy?annoying? yes yes and yes. *smile*
    we've a lot in common.

    Press on, my sister, you are doing the right thing: keep on obeying God and you will see the fruit.

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  3. Mindy, you are so right. I often have to remind myself of what a palace I live in compared to what most of the world considers a home. We truly are abundantly blessed in this country!

    Andrea, thanks for the encouragement and the knowledge that I'm not the only one out there with these struggles.

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  4. Hi Kendra-

    Great name ;) Just read your post at Femina and thought I'd drop by and introduce myself. Looks as if we're about ten years apart- it's rare I meet a Kendra older than myself but there are more and more younger Kendras popping up.

    Blessings-
    Kendra Fletcher

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